I found my Cyborg Acronym: B.E.A.T.R.I.Z. - Biomechanical Electronic Android Trained for Repair and Intensive Zoology. Ha ha ha! [Via Melissa]

We went to see Moulin Rouge! today. It is not my style of movie, but I have to do justice… it’s interesting and the music is not bad either. To be honest, I was expecting something different, like the typical love and tragic story (because I’m kind of cheesy) and what I found was a movie full of music, color and fun. Yes, not bad at all… but still not what I really like; I mean, music, color and fun yes… but well, kind of a weird movie for my taste.

Another week begins and it seems it is gonna be a lovely one, full of summer, sun, kids playing and nice things to do. I can’t complain about my weekend either; we just stayed home, relaxed and spent a lot of time dreaming of the future, planning the colors for the walls in our apartment and talking about the possibility of selling and buying a house so I can have my dog and my garden… and hopefully, my children.

It is funny, but I really don’t have much to say today… or maybe I do, but I don’t know how. Later, I will go for an appointment with the Psychiatrist so I can start the therapy for my Anxiety Disorder, which has gotten a little worse now with all this Diabetes / Prolactinoma thing going. At least I already got the letter from the Hospital and I will be going for my MRI soon. Sometimes I think how difficult it must be for my husband to take care of someone with so many health problems, but at the same time I thank God because Patrice is nothing but the kindest person, always willing to do whatever it takes for me to be well.

Yesterday, for example, for I’m suppossed to exercise often, he took me near the river here in Laval, and we walked like for an hour, looking at the sunset and still dreaming with the houses around. I felt really happy and I told Patrice that if I wasn’t sick my life would be totally perfect and that such thing doesn’t exist (a totally perfect life) because I was with him here, in this magnificent country. Yes, I have to say “Thanks God!”.

Notice: I will be changing webhosts this week and I really don’t know how it works so if my site is down, you know why.

Gosh! I’ve hardly had time to go online in the last two days with so much work! But I feel good when working for it keeps my mind busy and it makes me feel active and alive. I just wish I would have more time to spend with a dear friend who is going through a very hard moment… Hang in there, dear! You have told me that life doesn’t put us through situations we can’t deal with. My thoughts and prayers are with you and you know it. I might not be able to do a lot for you (in fact, you’re the one who does lots of things for me) but my friendship is unconditional and my heart is open always. God bless you! (Hope I will be able to see you later today).

Today, I’m the living proof of God’s kindness and the way He wipes our tears with wonderful moments. After the sad moment I had the night before yesterday and having a terrible morning yesterday, my life was filled with laughter, love and fun. Not only because I was reassured and my trust is back, but because I happen to have beautiful people around me who take the time to listen to me even if inside their hearts they are suffering too.

Today is such a pretty day, all sunny and fresh… makes me want running on the streets to tell everyone that I’m feeling better. And on top of that I just got this parcel from Colombia… my mom, my beautiful loving mom, sent me some gifts, one of them made by her blessed hands and a letter written by the poet she has inside. She even put her perfume on it, so when I opened I just cried of joy and said “Thanks God for my mother and her faith”. I’m truly overwhelmed today… by people’s kindness and the beauty of life even when things don’t seem to be going so good.

I wish everyone a day… so wonderful, so pure, so nice… like the one I’m having today!

What do we do when our trust is hurt? It is not easy to let go the feelings of sadness and fear… it is not easy to spend a single second without thinking what else is going on without us knowing about it. It is such a nasty feeling… it is the way I’m feeling now. And what is worst… I can’t talk openly about it here, but somehow I have to let it out because my heart and my soul are in so much pain and there is no one to listen to me right now. I feel I want to cry and scream, hit the walls, ask for a better explanation and not feeling like if it was my fault.

In Spanish we have a saying: “Quien calla, otorga” and that means that the one who keeps silence is giving you the right to believe what you want to believe. Because after confronting and not getting the right answers you feel even worse. It is like something special has broken, like a magical bond has been damaged… I just can’t explain.

Mom always told me not to put myself in situations where I can hurt others, especially when there is a certain stability in my life. And that is what I’ve trying to do for the last two years… and now I’m the one who’s hurt. I only wonder… is this horrible feeling of insecurity and mistrust going to leave somehow? I need lots of reasurement… and I need to know… what, who, how… yes, that’s me.

This new thing going on about 10 facts about ourselves and one of them not being true is cool so I’m going to try my luck here

1. I’ve never tried pot, marihuana, hierba…
2. I had my first real boyfriend when I was 19
3. Once I had 3 online affairs at the same time.
4. I have a tatoo of a butterfly on my shoulder.
5. Once I was put in probation at school.
6. The first time someone kissed me I was 11 and I didn’t like it.
7. I’ve eaten bat meat… yes, bat!
8. Once I hit a dog with my car, but it ran away.
9. I’ve sent internet virus on purpose.
10. I sent letters and gifts to a crush for a whole month.

Can you tell me which one is a lie?

Well, I’ve officially decided to start taking weekends off the blogging business so, on boring Mondays (like today) I can come and ramble about them; pretty good, eh? I had a good weekend, except for a nasty headache that went away after 14 hours and 4 Tylenol.

On Saturday my hubby surprised me with tickets for the Montr�al Expos Vs. Philadelphia Phillies game (The Expos won 12-5!). It was the first time I went to see a Major League Baseball game and even it was not a huge event I enjoyed it a lot. It is really exciting, especially because I like baseball and I want to go tomorrow because they play against the Atlanta Braves (my favorite team, because it was watching them playing that I learned about the sport - we had cable T.V and got the TBS station in my city).

Sunday was quiet. Patrice and I relaxed, watched some T.V. and organized the house. At 8:00 p.m. in Space Channel we saw this program about the “Conspiracy Theory” on the Man on the Moon issue. They put evidence very clear to say that americans never went to the moon, etc… The NASA says that they went… it’s a mess. Finally, like Rhett Buttler I said: “Frankly, my dear, I don’t give a damn”… LOL!

Today, I’m just here, updating my Favorite Reads list and chatting with some old friends My boss just call to say that they are going to give me more work (Yay!) so I guess I will be blogging from work this week (yes, I’m allowed to surf… he he!)

Well, I’m gonna take care of some other things here… take care everybody!