Weather forecast for today: 7C / Showers. I don’t care, it’s cold and rainy, but I’m so glad to be here! Today, for the first time in many months, I woke up and I didn’t feel anxious about my life, I was happy, full of hope, wanting to experience everything life will throw at me from now on.

It sure wasn’t easy yesterday with how crazy Pearson Airport at Toronto was, but I was thankful that I had a little bit of a hard time to test my strength. Plane from Bogota arrived behind schedule, so I missed my first connection to Montreal, so they put me on the next flight, but then things got just insane at customs where they checked ALL my stuff! I had 3 checked suitcases, 2 carry on’s… The guy checked absolutely everything, piece by piece, very nicely, but still I had to spend an hour in there, thus I missed my other fligh, the lady at the Air Canada counter was giving me a hard time about my bags again and I ended up arriving here at 9:30 p.m. I was a zombie on the plane, could barely speak, didn’t even take the drink they offered. I just put on my headphones, closed my eyes and overdosed myself with Coldplay and The Killers which were on one of the stations. I teared up when I listened to “Fix You” and then I got a grip and told myself I wasn’t going to cry unnecessarily anymore.

When I left Canada 10 months ago and the plane was taking off I didn’t look down, I hated everything and everyone in this country, I didn’t want to think about it, I didn’t want to be here. But when the plane was about to land last night, I looked down and thought I was crazy for doing this, but I felt so proud of myself… like REALLY proud and I thought “There’s MY Montreal”. I freaked out a little too, I knew P wasn’t going to be there anymore, I knew I was utterly alone, despite the friends I have here, I know this is a One Woman Show now. It’s going to be really hard, but it’s going to be good and I finally am going to grow up and be the person I want to be. Heartbreak doesn’t kill you, it makes you stronger, I’m sure of that now.

Plans for today? Lunch and fun with a good friend who wants to help me and listen to my stories, making important phone calls and booking tickets for my final destination. Today’s the first day of the rest of my life. Isn’t that a scary thought? But it’s liberating as well. When did I become this brave person? When did I! What do I do with all this freedom? Wow…

I’m tired as hell… pooped, really. Been up since 3:30 a.m., long day, good flights, terrible connections at Pearson, missed my flight to Montreal TWICE, first it was the plane from Bogota arriving behind schedule and then I got caught at customs for about an hour (the guys were cute, though… Heh!). But I’m here now, safe and sound! God, it feels like I never left. I can’t believe I’m only a few blocks away from my old house, but I feel good, I feel so good. I FREAKING MADE IT TO CANADA! I can’t elaborate much now, Elisa’s waiting for me upstairs (I’m in her basement, reporting at 11) so I’ll tell my wonderful coming home story later. I just wanted to check in and let my “fans” know that I’m alive and happy.

Do I kick ass or what? ;-)

6 hours before leaving on a jet plane. I hope this time I will actually leave, dammit! If airport is closed again or something else comes up, I’m gonna throw a fricken tantrum fit until they put me on a plane to Canada, I swear. I’m anxious to get there, start my new life, forget about every bad experience I had during this year and keep only the good things I learned about myself.

I’m here thinking… I feel like my heart has hardened in the last month and I don’t like it a little bit. I had a few good fibers left after separation, but somehow they’re dead now… heart has shut down, at least for a while. Maybe this is what I need to concentrate in what’s important, I just hope I won’t become a bitter bitch and forget all about love.

Oh well, I better go and get some sleep. Long day ahead tomorrow… and then I’ll be home! I feel like Dr. Elisabeth Corday (ER) when she goes back to her native London after Mark dies and she decides her home is definitely Chicago, so she takes Ella and tells her “We’re going home.” — I’m such an idiot, ha ha ha. I’m calling home a place where I have nothing and nobody, but where I know my dreams will finally come true.

Blog you later… when I’m back on line.

How long have I been talking about going back to Canada?
Here’s a (not so) funny story…

I woke up at freaking 3:15 a.m. to be at the airport at 4:30 for my flight to Bogotá and then connection to Toronto. I was there, first at counter, bags were checked, everything was ready… and then… and then… Bogotá airport was closed due to bad weather (that darn place can be little London sometimes with all the fog!). At 7 a.m. they finally announced the flight and I was all happy walking when… when… “Passengers with connections with Delta, Continental and Air Canada, present at counter.” — Yay! Great news, plane was going to be sent to Bogotá to fly over because airport was still closed and international connection passengers had to stay in Cali because we were going to miss the connection anyway. OH MY GOD! What a disappointment!

So, what’s next? Running all over the airport, getting bags back. They managed to send one of mine to Bogotá (that’s how ready everything was for my conquest of Canada!). Thank God it was one I had checked only until Bogotá because it wasn’t allowed as “carry on” on a domestic flight. Then it was about giving big smiles to the Avianca crew to see when I could be sent to Canada…

– Avianca Dude: “Sorry, not seats available until next Saturday, probably later.”
– Distressed Flyer: “What? No way! You’ve got to put me on a plane to Canada ASAP!”
– AD: “We’ll see what we can do, but we can’t promise anything.”
– DF: “Take me to your leader.” (LOL, not really, but kinda.)
– Leader: “How can I help you?
[Distressed Flyer tells her story, she waits for 1 hour while they make phone calls...]
– Leader: Let me put you on a higher rate seat, you don’t have to pay, we will.”
– DF: “All right!”

Gotta love talking to the people with power… I’m so charming, pfft! It took a while, a lot of getting pissy and asking for help, but I did it! I’m flying to Canada, against the darn geese who are coming south, on Monday, same time, same schedule.

Now I’m here waiting for the airline to bring my carry on bag and I feel like Ben Stiller in “Meet the Parents”. I hope they won’t lose the freaking thing or make me wait too long. I’ve gotta have that bag on Monday or I’ll go nuts. Oh, the joys of flying… Hmmm… I’ve waited for 10 months for this, I can wait for 2 more days. And well… family’s happy, I get to sleep and party. Gotta think positive, but I’m so going home!

Now that I think… It is funny! Who said my life was boring?