Introducing, El Jerko

Meet Mr. Jerk, the kind of guy who takes two places in the bus (meaning he puts his feet on the seat) and doesn’t give a damn about an old lady about to fall down. Then he proceeds to eat one of those granola bars and opens the window with the sole purpose of throwing the wrap on the street. Talk about wanting to beat the crap out of somebody, but I just rolled my eyes and said “c’est pas vrai” loud enough so he could hear me. Of course Mr. Jerk doesn’t really mind because he’s that, a big jerk. Don’t you just wish those people didn’t cross your path sometimes? The more I get to know Montrealers, the less I like them. Sorry about that, but some people in this city are too full of themselves.

Whenever I come across someone like that I always start by a good yelled “HEY!” immediately followed by a softer “What do think you’re doing ?” - rule #1 - never use foul language while you yell - rule #2 - pretend you don’t know the other person thought you were attacking them when applying rule #1

Inevitably I get one of two answers:
1) “What do you mean ?” - DENIAL EXPERTS. In that case I explain “I think you somehow forgot seats are for people and unconsciously threw the wrapper out the window - would you do that at your home ?” etc. (see next)
2) “What do you care ?” - CONFRONTATIONAL JERKS. In that case I reply, very calmly: “I care because I live here/nearby // take this bus everyday // love my city - What would you say if I follow you to your home and dump my trash in your mailbox for the next few weeks ? Anybody else whith me ?”

I try to use the same non-physical violence they use with their environment, psycologically. Perhaps I am too twisted or too tired or too lazy/afraid to snap their pictures (a project I considered for some time). Of course this is only for educational purposes, don’t try this in public transportation. ;)

Amen to that sister! I deal with Montrealers everyday on the phone. Many of them are very nice! but the majority realy just care about themselves. And wanting everything for nothing!? don’t get me started!